15 Painful Signs Your Husband Loves The Other Woman (And What To Do )

Married men sometimes lead a double life. They kiss you goodbye and then go to a hotel room to kiss another woman. Yes, infidelity is very common these days. Research has found that 61% of married men have cheated on their partners at least once. That’s not the worst part. The most heartbreaking part happens when such a man shows the signs that he loves the other woman and decide to leave you for her. 

Marriage is not a cakewalk. It can become extremely hazardous to your mental health if you find out about your husband’s adultery. You already have proof in your hand that your man is attracted to another woman.

Now we have to find out if he is just whiling away his time or if he is falling in love with her. Let’s take a look at all the signs of a married man in love with another woman.

15 Clear Signs That He Loves The Other Woman 

Some men cheat because they think there’s something amiss in their life. Perhaps emotional compatibility or intellectual compatibility. Some married men cheat just because they want to explore and experiment. 

However, according to statistics, most of the men, i.e, 71% of men cheat due to boredom. Maybe your man cheated too out of boredom but what if he is genuinely attracted to her? Let’s find out if he is. 

1. He is always talking about her 

One of the subtle signs that he loves the other woman is when he can’t stop talking about her. Amanda is like that. Amanda loves strawberries. Amanda has gone on a trip with her friends and whatnot!

It is nothing unusual or strange to know such things about a coworker or a female friend but talking nonstop about someone don’t know much about. This shows that your partner is interested in someone else. 

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2. He doesn’t care about you or the kids

You’ve been married for a while now and you’ve never had this complaint before. Your husband was always attentive toward you.

Because of the changed relationship dynamics, tables have turned now and it’s you who is chasing him 24×7.

You are the one asking how his day went and if he reached the office safely. Meanwhile, your emotions are being blindsided by your husband.

He doesn’t care about you or the well-being of his kids. This shows that he is pouring all his care and concern elsewhere. 

3. He has stopped being affectionate 

In a healthy relationship, being affectionate is one of the most important qualities.

Research attests that couples who indulge in affectionate gestures like touching each other often, paying compliments, hugs, and gentle kisses are happier and way more in love than those who keep a distance from their romantic partners.

If your partner has stopped being affectionate all of a sudden, it can be one of the signs he is seeing someone else and he loves her more. Janet, a 37-year-old housewife from New York, writes, “I know for a fact that my husband is having an affair. He has stopped cuddling or kissing me. I am afraid I am losing him to another woman.” 

4. He is physically and emotionally distant 

If your husband is distancing himself from you, both physically and emotionally, this could easily be one of the signs he is losing interest in you. This is because sex and vulnerability are two factors that keep a relationship healthy. 

Research has found that physical intimacy is responsible for happier relationships and higher levels of intimacy between partners.

Another study claims that vulnerability has a direct effect of relationship satisfaction as it builds trust between partners. 

You need to be physically and emotionally intimate with your partner to feel connected to them. If they aren’t being intimate with you, then someone else is fulfilling their needs.

If you can’t get rid of the other woman for good, you need to win your husband back by mesmerizing him like the old times. 

5. He is spending a lot of money on her 

How do you know if your man is in love with another woman? When you notice a lot of unexplained financial transactions. Where is this money going?

He is certainly not buying you presents or taking you out on fancy dinner dates.

Dig deeper and check his credit card statements. Suppose he is buying her jewelry and taking her out to luxury hotels.

Also, if he is in love with her and planning to choose her over you, he might have already rented a new apartment where the two of them can stay together. . 

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6. He has changed his appearance 

It is always believed that altering your looks is a subconscious way of trying to flatter someone. If your husband has suddenly transformed himself into a new man with a new charming personality, he is definitely seeing someone else behind your back.

It’s not so simple that he bought a pair of new shoes. A man cheating on you will tailor his looks based on his new woman’s taste.

He will change his wardrobe, hairstyle, hair color, and even his walking style to please the other woman. This drastic change isn’t for you.

It’s for the other woman. He is trying to impress her with his appearance and the way he conducts himself.

7. He compares you to the new woman 

It’s one thing to go out with another woman and hurt you beyond words. But comparing you to the new woman is reaching heights.

He is indirectly telling you that you need to be prepared for anything that could happen. It’s possible that he will leave you for her. 

8. He intentionally picks up silly fights 

He will fight with you for silly things because he purposefully wants this behavior to strain the relationship. That’s not it.

After an unnecessary fight, he will give you the silent treatment and make it look like it was all your fault when it wasn’t.

He doesn’t want to resolve the fight and he will drag it till he feels like it. He is deliberately seeing all your flaws with a microscope, whereas his vision is blinded to the other woman. 

9. His friends act weird around you

When his friends act weird around you, it’s one of the obvious signs that he loves the other woman. They know all about this new woman and perhaps they feel sorry for you.

They don’t know how to confront you with your husband’s infidelity and this is making them uncomfortable.

But how does the other woman feel about the wife? If the other woman is his friend, she will also be uncomfortable around you.

She will try to avoid you and you’ll know for sure that something is brewing between her and your husband. 

10. There are no date nights anymore

You’ve stopped going on date nights, impromptu holidays, and no ordering in and watching a movie together.

All the romantic things have vanished from your life because your husband is doing these things with someone else. You are just not important to him anymore and this makes it clear that your husband’s affair is getting serious.

“If your husband is ditching you to meet a certain friend, that’s not just a friend. He is definitely cheating on you. Plus, he is PRIORITIZING HER OVER YOU. That is exactly the reason l divorced my husband over his “friend”. You deserve a man who will put you over others”, writes a Reddit user on husbands ditching their wives for someone else. 

11. He avoids eye contact

If your husband is avoiding eye contact, it’s because he is feeling guilty or ashamed for doing something behind your back.

Studies have found that the feeling of guilt makes a person avoid their victim’s gaze. This is one of the evident body language hints that your husband is cheating and loves the other woman more. Some more body language signs include:

• Overacting during conversations and getting defensive when confronted
• His speech is fumbling 
• He prefers to give one-word answers like yes or no to avoid any problems
• He pushes you away when you try to kiss him
• Rolling his eyes or sighing when you speak 

A lack of eye contact means he is being dishonest. So, observe your partner closely and find out through his body language if he loves her more. 

12. His phone habits have changed 

His infidelity will be reflected in the way he uses his phone. For example, a husband who loves the other woman more than you will: 

• Have her pictures on his phone without being afraid of you seeing them 
• He will talk to her on the phone even when you are around 
• He will add her to all his social media profiles 
• You will notice her comment on his pictures 

These are some of the obvious signs he has feelings for someone else and so he is hiding things on his phone. Your man is attracted to another woman and he is leaving no stones unturned to let you know about their rendezvous. 

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13. He stops saying “I love you”

Those three magic words have disappeared from his dictionary. Saying “I love you” and expressing your feelings matter a lot in relationships.

Studies have found that it helps in dissolving fights between partners and improves the overall relationship quality.

If your husband has stopped being verbal about his love, it’s because he doesn’t feel the same way about you anymore. 

“A breakup could very well be in the cards…for a reason you may not even suspect. A lot of times when someone becomes emotionally distant, and the “I love yous” stop, it is because that person is either cheating on you already, or they have someone else being groomed to be your replacement”, writes a Quora user on partners not expressing their love. 

14. He jokes about divorce or seeing other people 

Partners should never joke about something so serious. If your husband is doing that lately, he has no respect for you and he is taking you for granted.

Perhaps he has already found a backup to replace you and he is just waiting for the right time to announce it.

Meanwhile, he is trying to test your patience by joking about divorce to see if you are brave enough to do the difficult thing and leave him.

That will make everything easy for him. Still, if you feel truly stuck and heartbroken, you can leave him and move on for the better. 

15. It feels like you’re the other woman 

It’s like the situation has reversed and you feel like you are no longer the wife. You feel like you are third-wheeling a couple and trying to break apart two people in love.

It’s like she is the wife and you are just someone desperately wishing to get your husband’s attention. 

She has become the wife as she is playing the role perfectly by listening to his woes, being intimate with him, and caring for him. He is taking her on date nights.

He is going on trips with her and he has even introduced your kids to her. When you feel like your husband is prioritizing someone else over you, it’s time to hold your head high and walk away from his toxicity.

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What To Do When Your Husband Loves Her More Than You? 

When you find out your husband loves the other woman more than you, it might take a toll on your mental health. It will be incredibly painful and it will take a jab at your self-esteem. Here are some things you can do when you find yourself in such a situation:

• Confront your partner but don’t be aggressive and volatile. Give him a chance to speak and use “I” statements to convey your feelings
• Find out the underlying reasons behind his behavior. What drove him away from you? Was it miscommunication, indifference in marriage, unmet sexual or emotional needs, or any other external factor affecting the relationship? Find out the reason so you can at least work on it to improve your relationship 
• Seek professional therapy as it’s a stressful time and you need to manage your emotions 
• If you are asking, “How can I make my husband love me more?”, you can do this by winning his heart back and by creating boundaries. Tell him he can’t talk to that woman again and he needs to block her from everywhere 
• If you don’t want to be with a cheater, you can end the marriage and move on 

If you spot some signs he will leave her for you and you’ve decided to give him another chance, then establish clear boundaries.

On the contrary, if you’ve decided to break it off, then good for you. Whatever you choose to do, prioritize self-care and your personal well-being.

Don’t let this betrayal pull you down and make you question your worth. Somebody else’s actions have nothing to do with you. Hold your head high and stay strong.

Just like everyone else, even you deserve love, respect, and fulfillment in your romantic relationship. It’s okay if you want to end or mend your marriage. It’s all about you here and no one else. Don’t worry about gossip and other silly things. Take care of yourself and prioritize your own happiness over anything else. 

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